Hello, I am Matthew Cree. Software engineer with an interest in functional programming and TIMECUBE TRUTH.
Currently innovating in the 4-CORNER DAYS where I leverage cutting-edge technologies to maximize user confusion through strategic meme implementation.
I'm not just a coder; I'm a DIGITAL SHAMAN guiding lost souls through the void between <div> tags.
As Jerry Seinfeld would say: "What's the deal with JavaScript frameworks? You install one package and suddenly your node_modules weighs more than a small planet!"
The five points of the digital pentagram represent the five horsemen of web development: HTML, CSS, JavaScript, PHP, and the dreaded IE6 Compatibility. When aligned with Mercury in retrograde, your cursor becomes a vessel for ancient internet spirits.
By visiting this page, you have unknowingly entered into a binding agreement with the DIGITAL VOID. Your soul fragment has been stored in a cookie with an expiration date of 4ยณ days.
Node.js package management is so sublime, it shares an important characteristic with quantum communications, both break when you look at them.
Just like Costanza avoiding his boss, my code avoids proper exception handling.
Long cat is looooooooooooooooooooong (epic win)
Sometimes I wonder if AI is just TimeCube in disguise, trying to teach us about the 4 corner simultaneous neural network layers in a single training epoch.
Has anyone else noticed how your IDE suggestions are always exactly wrong? This can't be coincidence - THEY know what you really want to type and are actively preventing it.
After months of studying the wisdom of Gene Ray, I have been officially certified in TIMECUBE mathematics! My thesis on "Applying 4-Corner Simultaneous Days to Frontend Framework Selection" received highest honors.
Looking forward to implementing these principles in my next project where I'll be building a website that exists in all 4 corner days simultaneously, allowing users to access content from yesterday, today, tomorrow, and TIMECUBE day.
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MY INTERNET PROPHECIES
๐๏ธ The internet is not a network of computers but a manifestation of our collective consciousness, bound by the laws of TIMECUBE. |
VISITOR STATS
1337420 |
I realized while sitting in the audience that orchestras are just human implementations of parallel processing. Each musician is a thread, the conductor is the scheduler, and the music is the output of their concurrent execution.
This proves the TIMECUBE theory of simultaneous execution across 4 corner days. The woodwinds exist in one corner day, the strings in another, percussion in the third, and brass in the fourth.
When you understand this, you'll see why monads are just burritos that wrap values. WAKE UP!
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